Every Terry Pratchett book contains a multitude of quotes that are hang-on-the-wall worthy. Some make you think. Some pull the cover back slightly on human nature. And some make you laugh so hard milk flies out your nose. All of Sir Terry’s books, however, are a joy to read. The Discworld novels are some of my favorite. Someday when I’m rich, I’m going to buy the whole 41 book series and build them their own shelf in my office.
I’ve read many of the books from various libraries. This week I started listening (rereading with my ears?) to THUD! I came upon this line from the Watch’s Captain Carrot after Commander Vimes asks him to report on the situation where troll gangs are about to square off with dwarf gangs as tensions run high near the anniversary of the infamous troll/dwarf Battle of Koom Valley.
Vimes has just arrived at the scene around the main city square. The troll gangs have left their bars and have set up camp on one side of the square. The dwarf gangs have left their bars and have set up camp on the opposite side of the square. Vimes asks Carrot for his assessment of both sides and Carrot replies,
“Just drunk enough to be stupid but too sober to fall over.”
What a great line! It says everything about the potential danger in a relatable but humorous way.
How does Vimes deal with this potential powder keg of a situation? He uses his outnumbered police force to undermine both sides of the conflict by secretly supplying them with beer that’s been spiked with harder spirits. In the end, most of the potential fighters on both sides simply pass out and are arrested.
Terry Pratchett was a master.
